Ready for Spring

We live on the coast so I really shouldn't complain about winter... but even though it's not as cold and snowy etc we still get the worst part about winter.

ILLNESS

I am so very very sick of a cold or stomach bug being spread through the members of our family in a never ending cycle. 

It's GORGEOUS outside right now and I'm laying here on the couch hacking away with this painful cough and now I have itchy red eyes too.  Thanks for bringing all that goodness home from Kindergarten Sanna.... 'preciate it. SO much.
I haven't posted much since the new year because honestly I'm just hanging on for dear life.  The year started out great with de-cluttering the house. I was totally Marie Kondo-ing the heck out of my clothes and books.  Then I realized it was keeping me from some paintings I need to do for some people so I put the organizing on hold while I worked on these paintings.
Then at the end of January, Griz got backed into by a car in a parking lot and wasn't seriously hurt but it set me back emotionally (guilt for not watching him better and teaching him safety I guess).  That guilt combined with my house and paintings and parenting and fitness being not how I wanted it and hormonal problems probably too... for a couple weeks I could feel myself sinking into a depression and I didn't want it to happen again.  I had a good talk with Brent and my friend Raylene and the next day decided to start a painting that I myself wanted to do.  Not a commissioned piece.  I put the other paintings to the side for a bit and got it started.  It is a painting of the Savior and I LOVE it.  I'm so excited about it and it really pulled me through. I don't know why that works for me but it does.  Glad I got it figured out faster this time than I did 4 years ago.  Anyway, besides the sickness I feel a lot better about life.  I still feel lonely and feelings of serious inadequacy a lot but I feel like I can deal with those things, it's not the dark depression like before.
I'm glad I was doing better before Grandma died.  It would have been harder to cope otherwise.  We buried her a week ago.  I miss her. I can't wait to see her again someday. I wrote more about that on Instagram.
I'll post pictures of the paintings when they are finished.  They're coming along pretty well and getting pretty close!

Heavenly Berry Cream-cheesey Cake

This cake is similar to cakes I've had growing up in Utah. The one my mom made for many a family party was called "Danish Dessert Cake".  The other one I had was called "Cheese Cake for a Crowd".  Both of these cakes call for the white cake mix to be prepared in a cookie sheet. Instead I often do 2 round cakes, it's easier to give away one of the cakes that way! I even enjoy doing it in a cheese cake pan because it's less messy that way. If you're taking it to a party, a cookie sheet will go farther. Either way, the important thing is that the sponge itself ends up on the thinner side. 

Ingredients:
1 white cake mix and ingredients listed on the box

2, 8 oz packages cream cheese softened to room temp

4 cups powdered sugar

1 pint whipping cream

2, 16 oz cans raspberry pie filling (or make your own filling which I did and honestly you could probably just use fresh fruit and ditch the sauce and it would still taste amazing)

Directions:
Grease a cookie sheet (11.5x16.5) 
Prepare cake according to package directions. If baking in a cookie sheet, bake it for 20 minutes or until cake tests done. Remove from oven and cool. 

Make whipping cream.
In a separate bowl whip the cream cheese and powdered sugar until fluffy and smooth, fold in whipped cream that you have already whipped into the mixture. Spread mixture onto cake, it’s supposed to be a nice thick layer, the more the better. 
Spread pie filling on top of the cream cheese layer. Add fresh berries on top too for added goodness! Refrigerate until ready to serve. 

This is how I made the berry topping but I doubled it and added extra sugar because it seemed too thin and tart due to the blackberries I also didn’t use fresh lemon juice cuz I didn’t have any:

2/3 cup frozen blueberries

 2/3 cup frozen blackberries

 1/2 cup water 

1/4 cup sugar 

2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice 

1 tablespoon butter

Combine first 5 ingredients in a small saucepan. Bring mixture to a boil. Reduce heat to medium-low; gently boil 10 minutes or until sauce thickens. Stir in butter.

more motorcycle pics

Christmas

I told the kids that if they came out of their room before 6:30 I would take away one of their presents.  At 6:30 on the dot Griz came and woke us up.  We got Brent and everyone awake (except Izzy, we let her sleep) and bleary eyed headed out to the tree.  We have video of most of it but here are some pictures:

this is her face that says... I didn't ask for this... what the heck is it...

This is my face after unwrapping the little hatchimal egg Sanna has been DYING to have me open for several days leading up to Christmas.

Griz's method of opening his comforter.

Checking out if he knows all the animals on his comforter.  He loved it!  We didn't get a picture of Chico checking out his comforter but he thought it was cool too.

Been begging for a lunchbox since he destroyed his Spider man one.

Acting surprised about the hat he asked for.

 Sanna got a new blanket too. She already had a comforter so we got her a velvet plush blanket we found at Ross.  I wanted to buy it anyway but then when we saw the eye mask we just had to. We couldn't stop laughing about it. We love when she wears eye masks to bed, it cracks us up.

Thor got some new toys too.

Izzy finally woke up and joined us. She was completely out of it for a while in a sleepy state. But then we started getting some reactions...

These fairy wings were so simple but one of her favorite things, probably because she specifically asked for them.

Santa gave him a gear ball.  We wouldn't let him look it up online how to solve it.  He figured it out on his own WAY faster than I thought he would. 10:30 a.m. is when this picture was taken.

 Izzy and Daddy were excited for him too.

Chico brought out all his cubes and was working on them. He re-scrambled his gear ball and was very frustrated for the rest of the day because he couldn't re solve it.

They got back out on their motorcycles pretty early in the day and started riding again.

These pictures however were taken that evening when it was starting to get dark.

This video shows how fast Sanna is learning to ride her motorcyle. Girl was on training wheels before this. Now she's riding! And her pure joy at exclaiming "best Christmas present ever!". It's how we all felt! The Harlows really knew what these kids needed to enjoy our property more!

We were getting ready to drive down to see our neighbors and then found out they weren't home so I took these pics as I was getting her out. She's too dang cute!!!!

Merry Christmas!

Christmas Eves (23rd&24th)

I had been kind of dreading church for the Christmas program on Dec. 23rd. I got asked to play a few duets on the piano with Tammy Aley, she's a really good pianist. She also asked me to do a few with Chico (a future amazing musician) for prelude. Many of you know how I freeze up when I play the piano in public. I’d much rather sing. This ward doesn’t seem to know I sing though so I keep getting called upon for piano. I have grown so much this last year in my piano playing. I don’t freeze nearly as badly. Today actually went really well, it was kinda fun even!!! It was a really cool music filled meeting. I do miss singing though, wish we had a ward choir.

One of her Christmas Dresses. We will have to take a family picture in our Sunday best another time with her other Christmas dress that matches Sanna’s. Brent had to work today.

Sanna needed in on this Christmas sunday selfies. She had already changed out of her dress however.

Pictures to come soon of the coolest Christmas gift ever! The Harlows brought their gifts to our kids Motorcycles!!! It took Sanna and Chico a bit to gain confidence. Griz took to it like a pro though. He's such a natural.

The kids have been over the moon excited about them, zooming all over our property. It's adorable!!! Even Sanna, who couldn't even ride a bike without training wheels has gotten the hang of it. We mostly have video but I'll have to post some pictures of them on here soon.

Christmas Eve finally arrived! They spent most of the morning riding their motorcycles.

I didn't get too many videos because I was busy inside.

It turned out to be a pretty busy evening with all the calling of family but still fun. Luckily our annual swedish meal isn't too terribly hard to make.  Open face sandwiches of ham, mustard, cheese on rye bread.

Cracker bread of course! 

And for dessert. The crown of the night. Is princess torta.  I forgot to buy chocolate for drizzling. Still tasted great without it, it's more for decoration anyway.

Ahhh, I love this stuff.

They got to open quite a few presents on Christmas Eve because of face timing with grandparents.   Sanna was the only one we captured a picture of before going to bed.  We stayed up way later than normal.

I woke up all throughout the night everytime one of the kids or Thor would stir or Brent would snore. I was on high alert.  Sanna put out this "Santa catcher" on the tree that was supposed to alert her when Santa came.  I started hearing this high pitched whistle during the night. It sounded like an alarm. It was so weird. Finally I realized it was coming from Brent's nose. Sometimes I really hate being such a light sleeper. I was very tired Christmas mid morning.